To set it up: I procured a Wii Fit pad from the McCallens. Time for fun. I obtain my "Wii age" from the mystical box while sober. It tells me I am 36. What the hell is that? It tells me I need to exercise more. That is bullshit. It tells me my upper body may be too weak. That is bullshit. At this point I am worried my experiment just got chucked out of the window by some Jap crap that doesn't know shit.
In spite of the adversity, I press on with my trial. I run hard at the Sunday Drill but only come up with 24:49. Dismal. Disappointing. The earth is spinning in reverse and all that.
What to do? Well, anyone with any balls now checks that "Wii age" again. I am only 12 beers into it at this point:
So the Jap magic box tells me I am now 41 years old. I only gained 5 years in 12 beers? That is a dismal damned return on beers consumed. I will now have to resort to Jack to get my age in the proper position. I have known that I was a senior citizen for some time now.
Well, at least I am not Can't Get Right stuck on the wrong side of the pond in the middle of a fog/rain storm (normal England weather).
F' it. I am out for now. Jimmie Johnson runs some kind of crazy shit and gains 10 positions in the last 8 laps of the race. But big dog Carl Edwards is your race winner. I will try harder next week. My apologies to all the pygmies...
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